I dated this girl for like 3 years and, obviously, tried many times to see how far making out would go. She was 9 years younger than me, just turned 18. It was surprisingly easy to get her undressed above the waist and do whatever, but she'd completely lock up if my hand ever even attempted to go below the waist. She'd never even take her clothes off below that level. Being the straightforward guy I just asked asked her what the problem was and she told me a story about how when she was 12, her uncle tried to rape her. I always treated her with care, her being so fragile and all, plus I had some serious marriage thoughts. After 3 years (in my culture marriages are around 21 years of age) I proposed and was rejected. It was going nowhere and we split to become "friends". Later on in an MSN Messenger chat (I still keep that file) our past relationship came up. She basically told me that she didn't have sex with me and we broke up because "I didn't press it enough". So it was my fault that out of respect and care for her, taking a NO for a NO, and keeping in mind the rape story, I didn't force her!?? The next guy went right for it and she lost virginity to him in like a week! So whatever you ladies say, my experience tells that: A. Women don't know and rarely sure what they want, so as a consequence, B. They say NO and mean YES a lot more often than they'd like to admit
It's a man's fault anyway. If I don't push her enough into having sex or demand or simply "take" her, I'm not male enough and cease to become attractive. If I do that, then "all men are rapist pigs that only want sex".
I was cautious and wasted time
Date: 2009-01-27 11:47 pm (UTC)So it was my fault that out of respect and care for her, taking a NO for a NO, and keeping in mind the rape story, I didn't force her!?? The next guy went right for it and she lost virginity to him in like a week!
So whatever you ladies say, my experience tells that:
A. Women don't know and rarely sure what they want, so as a consequence,
B. They say NO and mean YES a lot more often than they'd like to admit
It's a man's fault anyway. If I don't push her enough into having sex or demand or simply "take" her, I'm not male enough and cease to become attractive. If I do that, then "all men are rapist pigs that only want sex".